You always thought: "Only not with me!" For many years your husband gave you everything you wanted, and you were grateful to him for being close. You are so used to it that you forgot about vigilance, and your husband meanwhile deviated from his love for you, and began to look to the side. Coming back mentally, you can determine, with accuracy to weeks or months, even those moments when you first felt the loss of attachment, but did not want to admit it.
Remember how someone discovered lipstick in a car? Or did the husband, arriving late at night tipsy, explain that the smell of female perfumes came from the accountant Petrovna, whom he had encountered in the corridor when he left the director’s office? But today you will not be able to turn a blind eye to these facts - after all, you saw them together: him, and the blonde from the neighboring department, and even in the most explicit pose.
What to do? To retreat from the firing line, or revenge immediately?
First of all, listen to your feelings, and think about what moves you right at that moment. Cheating on a loved one is like a flash of bright light. It can hit in the eyes and blind, make you commit such acts, which then have to be regretted for a long time. And this is not surprising. After all, he, the bastard, is now experiencing such an upsurge of feelings and emotions with that blonde, while you are unbearably painful and lonely. Especially striking for pride is the fact that your rival is young, beautiful and smart.
The first impulses are very different - from immediately throwing his things from the balcony, grandiose beating utensils and filing documents for divorce, to the desire to return it, no matter what.
Meanwhile, Margaret Kent, an American psychologist and a well-known divorce lawyer, argues that you can not only restore your loved one’s affection, but also make your relationship more harmonious and benefit from your crisis. Which one? We will talk about this later.
Tidy up feelings and emotions
First of all, understand that your beloved is with you, and not with her, no matter how disappointing it may sound. He has not left you so far. This means that he needs you more than his new lover, and it is still possible to return his emotional attachment. Moreover, it is quite possible to do this, even if he told you that he was going to temporarily live separately.
If you are determined to return your loved one, you will have to go through a lot. First, to abandon the vengeance plans dictated by one's own fury. It is much more useful for a situation to look at it rationally and act in its own interests. The main task is to hold emotions and control oneself enough. But there is also the exact opposite side - for some girls it may seem that the rival appeared through your fault. Stop executing yourself! Do not waste time mourning for the best moments of your life. You can really be angry with him, and you have every right to do so, but for now it’s better if he does not know about your “knowledge”, at least until you have developed an action plan.
How to confront an opponent
A lover may think that she is trying on the role of wife, but according to statistics, another woman for the vast majority of men is just a beautiful application in order to make a difference in her life. Rarely does a man experience such a passionate love that overshadows everything in the world. Most often, this is just like a summer camp for a school teacher - because because of a couple of summer months, he will not give up his main job.
So, you are one against their two. You must replay both in order to destroy your lover’s plans to get your husband on your terms and push your loved one to choose in your favor. Remember that so far he has not decided which of the women to prefer, or even is not going to do it at all, wanting to leave everything as it is. Think - after all, the goals of your mistress and your husband are different. Play it.
Do not simplify the task of the opponent, arranging scandals under the influence of explosive temperament. To drive a wedge between the "doves" will allow some tricks that are better to use when the husband is not aware of what you "know."
If something does not suit you, do not hesitate to proceed to the next step. The main thing is not to stop and not to reveal your anger ahead of time.
So, criticize him
If you were still perceived as a caring bore, always ready for anything, remind him of his shortcomings. Without reproaches and scandals. And do not let him think that he is too perfect for you.
Let him be smarter and stronger than others, but do not let him think that he is superior in your mind and quick wits to you. You may find that your opponent loves to command and needs attention, learn from her.
Dress up
Remember - this is a mandatory step. If until now you sacrificed your desires in terms of clothing for his good, the time has come to establish a balance. Buy yourself everything you need, even if you have to get into debt.
At the same time, you should do a facial massage, dye your hair. And let you decide to quit it, in any case, you will become more attractive to other men.
First, wake up a woman who has slept for a long time. Buy yourself stockings, and slowly put them on in front of the mirror. Of course, before his eyes. And to his questions - shrug mysteriously and answer - "I myself don’t know."
Call him several times a day.
Let a couple of calls be at a precisely set time, and a third at an arbitrary time, each time in a different way. He will feel uncomfortable, constantly waiting for a call. Come to his work without warning, but not for long. Make contacts with his colleagues at work, let them consider you an ideal couple.
Give him your photo in a frame
It is advisable where you feel happy. If there is no such photo, take it and try to put it on the table at his work. Make a gentle signature on it: "I love you" or "How well together." Let her see it. Try to be a constant obstacle to their meetings, it is better than to yield to his opponent without words.
His sense of responsibility and your unpredictability
As long as your husband does not know about your awareness, you have a trump card in your hands. After all, your rival depends on him much more than he does. Changing plans unpredictably, you can lead her into a state of despair.
For example, if you regularly went out with relatives, leaving him time to meet with a rival, let him know that you decided to change plans before you leave, thereby upsetting your dates. It is especially important to arrange this on her birthday - she certainly will not forgive.
Try to come up with something the next time to spend time with your husband alone, and not give him the opportunity to meet her. An unplanned party for your mutual friends works perfectly in this regard, at which you will have to play the perfect relationship.
Sexual Strategy
Without any hesitation, try to seduce your husband sexually to save the family, even if you have recently become cold to bed comforts.
The first thought of a deceived wife is to stop all relationships, to avoid intimacy.
Remember, doing this, you render your rival simply invaluable service. Intimate relationships should be especially intense on the eve of the intended date. It is worth hinting to your beloved that recently something interesting has been happening to you that awakens your sensuality. You just can't stop!
A kitchen as part of an arsenal against a rival
Before leaving home, always feed him your favorite foods. This is especially useful if he was going to have dinner with a rival. When his body is focused on digestion, he will not be able to concentrate on dinner with her, and his lover will be able to perceive this as a personal refusal. In addition, sexual activity of a fed man is falling, he wants to sleep more.
How to hint to him that you know about their connection
Use this moment to expose the opponent in an unsightly light. Tell us how you met his mother’s old friend in the store and she told you that you have a relationship with this blonde. Tell us how you answered that this is just nonsense, and your wonderful husband cannot have a connection with such a rude and uncouth person. And that if he wanted to change, he would have shown a much better taste.
Let him deny these "gossip", do not argue with him, let him prove to himself that this is not true.
Infidelity lover
If you are familiar with her, try to convey that your husband is constantly cheating on you with some “inflatable dolls,” as he calls them, so you don’t have any desire to be jealous of them. Show off your rich intimate life, which has only recently improved. Thank your husband’s invisible lover for such a gift.
There is some irony in the fact that a lover always requires fidelity, this is very important for her. She does not consider his wife a rival, but another woman can significantly shake her balance.
One way or another, but by such actions you will drive a significant wedge into the relations of "doves", and you will only have to shatter it more and more. And now about the benefits that you can derive from this struggle.
Last step
If all your efforts remain in vain, open the cards and get away from it yourself. Release him ... for a while. Indeed, according to statistics, 85% of men prefer to stay in their family.
It is unlikely that he will invite a rival to live in your house. But it’s too early for the opponent to celebrate the victory.
When she begins to insist, he will have to go to her. Is that what he wanted? If he had dreamed about this, he would have done it a long time ago.
Now, being isolated and “between two fires”, he will try to restore his former state. When you disarm him and break the main desire to save both of you, he will have very good arguments to return you. And perhaps you will change roles, and now he will try to keep your connection. Your main task will be solved - the opponent at this moment will move to another plane.
And you? Hardened up in battles, you will become confident, attractive, and quite possibly get a couple of fans. Now you yourself will begin to discuss the topic - do you need it yet?
